Unfinished Dad

The Good, The Bad And The Ugly

The weekend saw a couple of hits and misses here in Chevy Chase.  The weather finally turned from biblical to beautiful, and on Sunday we drove over to Great Falls Park to make the most of it.  With a few thousand of our friends, we took advantage of a rare mid-November 70 degree day, collectively trying to keep our children from jumping into the river.  Tilda didn't seem to understand that, in this one instance, she was not afforded the same luxuries as the dog.  The more I kept her from the river's edge, the more she cried.  Eventually she pulled a page out of her sister's book and lay in the dirt crying until we gave up and left.  Now, the camera doesn't work without a memory card, so here is a photo that a friend of ours took right as Tilda reached the water.

This weekend also saw a setback in the sleep department.  Annie has decided that she doesn't want to sleep without her best friend.  I have tried everything from ignoring her cries, to rationalizing with her, to bribing her with presents.  Last night I asked her, after an hour of crying, what she would rather have, a present for trying to sleep unassisted or her Bob. She took me for the fool I was, and two seconds later she was sleeping soundly, Bob firmly in mouth.  What do I do now?

Finally, we seemed to have reached the critical mass of ensnared cave crickets in order ward off any newcomers to my basement.  There are now eight traps down there.  Four of them are completely full and the remaining four vary from half full to a lone cricket in the trap furthest from the washing machine.  He was either an outcast or a fool.  Though, considering his massive size, he may have just been the baddest, most adventurous.  I'm not about to call this battle over - reinforcements can't be too far off - but I think I can keep the upper hand if there are always glue traps spread around the basement.  They really seem to love huffing that gel.

Behold! The Magical Land of Clemyjontri!

Clemyjontri.

Really that's all that needs to be said, but for those of you unaware that the greatest playground in mankind's brief history is sitting in your backyard, let me gush a bit.  Located in McLean, Virginia, Clemyjontri Park (a name derived from the primary benefactor's four children) is a handicapped accessible playground perfect for children of all ages.  The entire surface—and it’s a considerable size—is rubberized.  So when your 2 year-old falls off the see-saw and your 1 year-old trips over her new shoes, they come up smiling.  For every piece of equipment that is meant for the fabled 5 to 12 year-old demographic, there is something for the toddlers too.  We spent over an hour there this morning and, despite temperatures in the 40's, the kids were happy the whole time.  That is until one of the mothers let her son walk around with a bag of Cheez-Its.  He was like the Pied Piper.  

Before we get to the pictures, know this parents—the last picture is the only one that made me truly smile.  The architects of this great oasis may have actually had someone like me in mind.

Tilda and I weren't sure what this was exactly, but it looks cool.

 

Kiddie Maze!

 

100 Meter Dash.
 

Slides are for napping?

Pitfall on Atari was a great game, no?

 

Don't worry the carousel is open on weekends still.


Ahhhhhhhh.

Dr. Gridlock

I love traffic.  Not the being in it part, but the thinking about how the hell it happens part.  Living in DC, then, is like being a baseball fan in the early 50's in New York.  We are in the golden age of traffic.  Even before politics, this town talks traffic.  People decide where to start their family based on three reasons: schools first, political affiliation second, and traffic a close, sometimes interchangeable, third. 

You never leave the house without first considering how long your trip will take and what route best suits your needs.  One never knows when they are going to get stuck on the Beltway—I don’t even know what direction the traffic flows and when—or when the five mile trip up Rockville Pike to Target will take the better part of an hour. 

Last weekend we drove from Chevy Chase to Alexandria, VA.  Fortunately the yin to my traffic yang is my wife, who doesn't love traffic, but maps.  She consulted her DC Metro gazetteer and after discarding the old ways (Beltway), and the new ways (Reno Rd, to Mass, to 14 St and bridge), she settled on the scenic way (through Rock Creek Park and around The Tidal Basin to 14 St and bridge).  And that was just this trip.  I could give you 10 other routes we have taken in the past.

We even have someone at our local paper who writes about traffic.  Not since that time I saw giant dump trucks driving up a 200 foot pile of salt in Baltimore have I looked at someone else's career and thought, "Damn, I'd like to do that."  You never know, with the predictions of LA like traffic jams in our near future, a second Dr. Gridlock may be needed.

Swine Flu Update

Matilda's 15 month checkup was this morning.  Good news!—she’s average.  She landed firmly in the 50th percentile for everything.  Height, weight, head, and all those fun developmental indices are what you would expect out a second child, a child whose parents forget that they used to monitor those things like the weather.  She did come up in the 90th percentile on the Alfred Hitchcock jowl density and buttony chin index.  So there's that.

On a related note, we have decided to get her and her sister the seasonal and swine flu vaccines.  They were, obviously, out of the swine, but good ol' seasonal was freshly stocked.  Now that the decision is made I feel kind of funny about it.  As I type this, Matilda is upstairs napping with influenza, no matter the amount, swimming around in her system.

Phew, Billy Corgan Says My Kids Don't Need The Swine Flu Vaccine After All

Rest easy friends of Unfinished Dad.  I no longer need to worry about vaccinating Annie and Tilda.  Though swine flu is still a serious threat, a government created one no less, Billy Corgan of Smashing Pumpkins fame says this whole national emergency thing is just fear mongering to sell more pharmaceuticals.  You know what, I kind of agree with him.  Well, about the fear mongering part anyway.

"Our American President Obama has declared a national emergency about this virus, which he in his own words said was, at this point, a preventative measure. So, why declare an emergency if there isn’t one? ... I am more focused on the vibration that has us all so fearful: both for how the fear affects our thinking, and how, in our fear, we attract the worst, and, in conjunction with that, how those fears are used by others without integrity to try to create a power against Us to promote discomfort and dis-ease."

I feel better.  You?

Dodging Swine Flu

Swine flu officially has my family surrounded.  I hadn't given it much though until recent weeks, when it dawned on me that Annie probably isn't the only 2 year-old who fails to cover her mouth when she coughs.  We aren't big lovers of vaccines.  We get them - we're not Jenny McCarthy or anything - but we don't run out and beg for them.  Now I find myself wondering if we should take the plunge.

 The first confirmed case in our world was in a 3 year-old class at Annie's school.  For the most part parents are good about keeping their kids home when sick, but the week before, we were sent an email about children showing up just "a little sick." The email arrived with a sharp reprimand from the school's director reminding us that things like swine flu were, you know, kind of all or nothing.

The next day we were sent another email from the director with a second case (also a 3 year-old class) in which a sibling tested positive, and the mother said it was "mild,"  Suspiciously, we weren't told if that particular child had been in school all week.  Two days ago, we received yet another email about a mild case of swine flu, this time in a 4 year-old class.  

Finally, I was out in the yard yesterday when a neighbor told me that the 15 year-old across the street was holed up with swine flu.  Suddenly, I wondered if she had given Annie a high five this week.  Or if she was on the bus with the other neighbors who love to visit Annie and Tilda after school.  Or if her family's dog sniffed my family's dog's butt and...you know the rest.  When Annie went to bed, I was convinced she felt warm.  Is it possible to give someone psychosomatic swine flu?

Now I'm that parent who is convinced his house doomed.  I see swine flu around every corner and I'm seriously considering getting vaccinated.  I know this isn't Captain Trips, but it suddenly seems serious.  What do you think, is this just a shift in my mental state or is it time to run out and get the family their swine flu vaccine?

Obligatory Pumpkin Pickin' Pics

We went to Butler's Orchard this weekend with 20,000 of our closest friends.  Somehow, the sheer volume of people was not an issue.  Those Germantown Butlers have been pumpkin farming since the last ice age 1950—they had that place freaking humming.

Amidst the throngs we...

Potato sack slid...

And tended the fields.

We warmed the pumpkins...

And got frisky when we thought nobody was looking.

And finally, said, "Hey sheep, howya doin'?  You're a sheep right?  What's that all about?  Well, say hi to your motha  for me."

Windy Day On The National Mall

Last Thursday we found ourselves doing some sightseeing (another relative in town) on The National Mall.  It was the windiest day in the history of the world.  The Washington Monument was closed down because it was bent over like a young willow tree in a tornado.  It was so windy that Tilda couldn't walk without assistance.

While there, we stumbled upon The Solar Decathlon, a tremendously nerdy, super cool event in which colleges from around the country compete to create the baddest "green" home they can.  I liked these.

The competition finishes up this weekend and is worth taking a look, that is if all the homes haven't been blown away.